Our natural state should be contentment, but our natural propensity is to accept anger, disappointment, frustration and sadness. It’s very easy to be miserable. Therefor, when someone is miserable, they want others to be miserable too. This is easy. Allowing negative thinking to grow and to continue by talking about how bad things are, about how much another person annoys you or about your issues or illnesses causes some sort of hole in our being. Continuing to let these things affect us can be cathartic. There’s definitely a sense of relief when we express to another how we feel about something to a friend or even a stranger. Talking to our friends about how someone treated us badly out in public, or talking about how awful our ex is or even talking about our health issues and how they prevent us from doing things. These are all natural ways of being. This is the easy road.
I know, anyone with depression or anxiety or any other illness will tell you that it’s not easy. You know why? Because changing it is hard, really, really hard. So continuing to dig that hole that you find yourself in is what you know how to do. So you will continue to do it because that’s the only way you know how. I get it, doctors and health specialists tell you you have a disease and you go to counseling, take medications and try almost “everything” before admitting that nothing works. Of course none of this is going to work because when you expect to find an external solution to an internal problem you will never find the answer.
But choosing something different, choosing to be happy is even more difficult than to keep digging. For nearly a decade I dug myself into a hole so big, I had rather die than pull myself out. I was miserable and it felt like I cried nearly everyday. I was on antidepressant after anti-depressant and nothing seemed to lift the heavy weight I carried around day, after miserable day. I went and saw counselors, psychologists and psychiatrists. None of them had the answers to help me. They were only there for me to perpetuate my own sad story, that I felt bad, really, really bad.
More than 10 years later, I feel great! I have so much love and abundance in my life that I cannot even begin to list the things that I am grateful for. So much has changed because I chose to change. One day I just decided that I no longer wanted to be on medication. I no longer wanted to see doctors and complain about how bad I felt all the time. No longer was I going to live this sad, pitiful life and tell the same sad story.
So I chose to live, and once I chose to live, I decided to thrive. About this time was when I discovered yoga. I was in my late 20’s and it spoke to me. It made me feel more alive than I had since I was 13. It gave me something to look forward to. At the time, I did not know it would be my path in life, but I knew that it was good for me. The more I practiced, the more I wanted to know about it.
Soon I started to feel a little better about myself. Soon, I started to even like myself. During that time, when I was in a bad place, I took a long hard look at myself and realized that I didn’t like the person I was. I realized that I wasn’t someone who I would want to hang out with. The type of people I wanted to hang out with were positive, happy people. Since I spend most of my time with myself, I needed to become a positive, happy person. And after years of practice, I can say that I am. So I want to help others do the same. But help cannot be received if you are not willing to change.
As long as you have an excuse for not doing something good, your life will never change. As long as you keep telling yourself that you are sick, you will continue to be sick. As long as you keep talking about how bad things are, things will always be bad. As long as you keep putting garbage into your mouth, you will never get healthy. As long as you keep reading trash, your mind will stay filled with trash. As long as you continue to watch negative images on TV, social media and in the movies, your thoughts will continue to repeat those patterns. As long as you take joy in the downfall, injury or embarrassment of others, you will never feel happiness for yourself. As long as you continue to meddle in the lives of others, you will never take a look at yourself. As long as you let the lives of others affect you, you will continue to be miserable. Other people’s issues are not your issues. So take a long, hard look at yourself and ask yourself this question: AM I HAPPY?
What do I mean by that? More than happy, are your content with what you have? Are you excited to wake up each day to see what life has to offer? Can you see the beauty in every little microcosm of this amazing earth?
No? Then how can you change it. One small step at a time. One day at a time. Choosing small changes that will help your health, your mental clarity and your relationships.